so I stopped on the phrase "Your life is worth to be yours!"
But how to understand that something goes wrong that life is passing me by, wasted? Recently I read a phrase of F. Perls (founder of Gestalt therapy), which actually brought me back to thinking: "...a grain of wheat actualizes itself as a wheat – plant never as rye". And never as poultry, fish, fruit or vegetable – I added mentally.
A person? And the man can.
We can be anyone, to adapt to different situations. And moreover, each of us will do it differently. We wear different masks, play different roles, which are often hundreds and sometimes forgetting, how does our true self.
How to understand that we played, forgot to take off another mask, lost the way to itself? Bells really very much. This is what I wrote in a previous article, but also a vague sense of missed opportunities, and inexplicable anguish, sadness, and inexplicable, causeless, at first glance, the flash of anger, of rage. It is the fear of death, rooted in a deep sense that life is lived in vain or not, as desired, this feeling of emptiness that seems nothing is impossible to fill. It's recurring thoughts about his uselessness, low importance for others. It's the inner confidence that You are worth more and better than what exists (but do not want to be). This feeling of internal conflict, insensible despair.
once during the regular therapy sessions, one young man said to me: "I live in constant tension. Every day and every event for me is the choice between me and others. If I make a choice in favor of themselves, then against another, and if for another, then against themselves. And while the account is not in my favor".
Nietzsche once wrote about the possibility of the infinite repetition of life as we lived it, without any changes. Try to do this experiment and You. Here's the experiment: imagine that "This life as you now live it and have lived it, you will have to live once more and innumerable times; and nothing in it is new, but every pain and every pleasure, every thought and every sigh and everything unspeakably small and great in your life will be anew back to you, and all in the same order and in the same sequence ... do you want this again and again countless times?"...
And if at the end of the experiment You will say to yourself "Yes, I want to live this life again" – that's fine. If Your answer is the opposite, You might think that I would like to change in your life, try another.
And now, as I write this text, I think that I could recommend to myself if I could go back to that moment when I started finding my way. Here is what seems important to me:
- first, to stop. The movement always starts from a stop. Stop and listen to yourself. Not brushing aside an unpleasant thought, but definitely pushing all the edifying and moralizing of others who supposedly know what's right and what's best. Or only for me trying :)
- second, to recognize that in my life right now. As a fact. Granted. Bitter, hurt, hurt... but it's true. For the time being. It was at this moment. Possible to cry. If you want to. And again not to run. This time, from my feelings.
This is the beginning of the path to himself. And in this way IMPORTANT! not to forget about the care and solicitude to him. Not to fall into self-blame, not to criticize and "kill" yourself for the mistakes. Learn to allow yourself to make mistakes, to accept failure as something that has a place in every person's life.
And then what? Then again to stop to listen to yourself and YOUR desires, to see their capabilities and limitations. And so, step by step, closer and closer to him
!
