Recently a friend told me a story about one person who got a job a simple fisherman in a large farm two months rose to Director of the farm, and after a month received a gift from the founder of the lake in this farm worth a million dollars. And before that, he, getting a job for a few months rose to the highest leadership positions and also in a short time was dismissed from.
Surely You have met people who are very quickly and easily able to inspire confidence and graces of those around them. And among my acquaintances was a man, he was distinguished ability with a stunning ease to borrow any amount and of course no refund. Although, I must say, it brought him to a sad end.
But not talking about it. And about it with its stunning ability to borrow money. And he could borrow freely, even to those who knew him well and understood that I will not return. Even I, as a psychologist and expert in interpersonal communication, knowing what was happening, just physically could not refuse the request to give anything in debt. Honestly, I was even afraid when meeting with him that he can ask and I won't be able to refuse. And when at a meeting of our mutual friends, one of them boasted that this man gave him an old debt, it really impressed the audience.
So what is the secret of these people?
How they manage so easily to agree with others?
Such a person is able to quickly and easily become the closest person during communication, powerfully influencing the subconscious of the interlocutor and causing the corresponding reaction of the body, suppressing the weak voice of the rational mind, trying somehow to resist this influence. Of course, this should have several important qualities, but I will tell you about the most important, without which the charm of the impossible.
it May sound surprising, but the primary role is played by the tension of the body, or rather, lack of it. I will explain what it is.
think about it close friends, or perhaps distant relatives. Moreover, few thought that "far" and "close" is a literal marking of distances at which we are comfortable to be with them when communicating. That is, in accordance with their status for us, we in their domestic space they allot a certain distance like in communication and in thinking about them. The closer we are to someone, the closer the distance we allowed as on the physical plane, and in the imagination.
And the distance is between people close and far, felt in the body or tension, or relaxation. You can easily verify this by monitoring their condition, for example, during a trip in the Elevator where one has to be at a close distance with strangers or unfamiliar people.
that's why people are brought together by a joint use of food or stimulants, lunch, tea, Smoking and corporate. After all, what happens at the moment you drink somewhere at the event? Tension, rest, as well as those people who are close, and at that moment, they felt like close friends or relatives. Besides, people in these moments converge as in a literal, spatial dimension, and in the internal mental. In these moments, if anyone remembers, recently acquaintances or colleagues are almost native people. Well, what we do for native people? At least, much more than for the unfamiliar.
the Main secret of success of people, quickly within the trust lies in this effect. These people are always relaxed when you communicate and relate to others as loved ones. And they are so confident play this "role", forced to participate in it and the person with whom they are currently communicating, causing to his warm, positive emotions. At the time of communication that person becomes a very close person, which, of course, want to help, no matter what he asked.
I did not time the training was asked how can I learn patience?
You may want to experiment in this direction, observing their condition at the time of the contact with other people, to feel the difference in your body's reactions when communicating with loved ones, strangers or unfamiliar people.
But I can give more. It is the understanding of how these people with high communication skills, see people. And if You're going to see others, Your ability to negotiate will increase significantly.
People, great able to find contact with any person, perceive others as a source of resources and entertainment, so communication with the other brings them genuine joy, enthusiasm, confidence and peace of mind. And if You manage to see or feel during intercourse, I assure You, You will be able to get the sides a lot more than that You have worked.
Therefore, a relaxed body and attitude to the interlocutor, as to the source of good resources (not a problem), make your communication more effective.
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