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PERSONAL BOUNDARIES is one of the favorite topics in work with clients.
Often a person with a weak inner boundaries facing violations of their from the outside, difficult to refuse friends or family and guilt because of the failure.
When we say to another "YES" out of courtesy and guilt, we say a firm "NO". Then fails himself in some way.
this feeling of guilt can haunt a person from childhood. It is important to start telling yourself YES. You can start from the little things.
children also Have personal boundaries. Child every time hearing "NO" in adulthood will refuse himself.
People in different measure allows himself to break his own boundaries. He might just not even feel them. This happens in order to please important people.
the Reason for this internally and a deep desire to love parents and to please them. In adult life the person carries the projection of the parents on others. It's a bad habit from childhood.
Example: parents praise the child when he is obedient and curses when the reverse behavior. The child learns this pattern of behavior and will apply it. He believes that this is good, because it taught him parents.
Well, when the parents take the child and kept it There. It promotes the ability to protect and defend yourself.
it is Important to study and train to say "no" to relatives and friends, even if in the beginning will disturb the conscience.
That you can do yourself to strengthen its borders?
Give yourself personal time. This can be reading books, taking a walk, quiet Cup of tea, a trip to the manicurist or something.
it is Important to designate in advance their loved ones and agree that they will not distract You. br>
to Do something that was forbidden in his childhood. For example: buy toys that are not allowed.
Start by asking yourself every time You ask someone to do something or offer something. "I want to do this?"
Gradually learn not to do what you do not want. Start to listen to yourself.
In your power to change your life for the better! All personal boundaries!
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the sataeva Ramil