Trrr.... Trrrr... Trrr... Someone very strongly wants to talk to me. The room is unfamiliar... it's early in the morning... It could be anyone... And suddenly he wants to ruin my day? Or to say the bad news is... what happens if I do not answer the phone? And suddenly it's something important?
... All these thoughts in a split second, pushing and superimposed on each other, arise in the mind. The dream vanished. The heart is so palpable now. And the clock is ticking loudly...
Anxiety is a tricky bug. LOVES UNCERTAINTY. Get out of the hole at the most inconvenient time and buzzes.
So. Well scat!
-Hello?
- Hello. It is the center of studying of public opinion. Could You give us a...
But seriously, this experience is familiar to all, but know very little about him. For example, ANXIETY is OFTEN MISTAKENLY CONFUSED WITH FEAR. Alas, it's not the same.
On the physical level of fear felt like a twisting in the abdomen, and anxiety experienced as a squeezing in the chest, preventing to take a deep breath (as if people want to freeze). Simultaneously, your heart rate increases as if people somewhere to run. But in fact, he goes on: "look at me, you might think that I sit quietly on the chair, but actually, I'm on my way to do so-most-important-thing". br>
the TROUBLE ARISES INSTEAD of STOPPED ACTION.
example:
People in a hurry for an important meeting. He left the house a little later than planned, so time to spare. He stands at the bus stop waiting for her bus, which is not. The longer the wait, the higher the anxiety. In mind a person calculates the options on how to get to the meeting – to go with a change, catch a taxi, to wait a little longer... the Excitement, the energy inside – a lot. Experiences too much fear to be late and make a bad impression, disappointment, irritation, etc. And action no. The man shifts from foot to foot, walk on stop here and there, changing in the face... But the alarm will retreat only when it decides to BEGIN to TAKE appropriate action – will warn that linger and will quietly wait for the bus, or will hitchhike. br>
the pattern of LIFE WITHOUT ANXIETY looks like this: the need appeared – based on feeling the need I realized – there was a rise of energy (excitation) began action to meet needs desired is reached, everyone is happy.
If you break this chain - not aware of need or experience, or not to perform an action, then there is trouble.
WHY do ANXIOUS PEOPLE FEEL tired all the time?
Imagine that you have suddenly appeared a Guinea pig. And it's some big secret. No one needs to know that you have it. Especially households. You follow her every whisper, begging me to be quiet, sneak, fed her, and honestly trying to behave as usual. And you can almost do it. Well, if you do not pay attention to constant tension, inability to concentrate, suspiciousness and irritability. The more you try to control it, the more tired.
With alarm – in the same way. The harder you try to restrain and suppress internal energy, which wants to be realized in the actions or emotions that really want to be deliberate and pronounced the more tired. br>
an Extreme version of the symptoms of anxiety is the desire to control the whole world. To do nothing at all: the exact schedule, full obedience to all family members, plan a, plan B, in case of failure of plan A, and, for hedging the plan In,G.,
the Most curious thing is that all this is just words. That is, the higher the anxiety, the more fantasy and less action. br>
worst of all recognized EXISTENTIAL AND TRAUMATIC ANXIETY. They often lie at the core of panic attacks.
So fear of death may occur when the person badly feels, is aware of himself, living "your life". These people deep down are afraid that at some point they will simply cease to be.
severe anxiety when approaching in a relationship (fear of intimacy) may be associated with fear of dissolution in Another, the extinction, absorption. Or may be the result of previous negative experiences, that is, arises as a defense against pain or rejection. br>
And now I would like to summarize small results, but at the same time tell
HOW to COPE WITH ANXIETY?
in milder ATTACKS really don't immediately rush to the pharmacy. There are much more useful to you steps. They not only help to cope with the current concern, but also promote the development of the whole person.
1. The basis of anxiety can be stopped the action. If you feel the growth of anxiety, ask yourself: "What I really would like to do but not doing it." br>
2. Anxiety is not an isolated feeling. Most often it is one or more unrecognized, not reached to the awareness of experiences. It is something like fog, dense clouds, behind which hides the feeling. It is not necessary to suppress or ignore the alarm. If you are experiencing anxiety, ask yourself: "what in fact I am now in this situation, I feel (anger, fear, resentment, embarrassment, attraction, etc.)?". And then – go back to p. 1.
3. The cause of the alarm can also be an internal conflict, provided that the person is unable or unwilling to make a choice in favor of one of the solutions.
If this is your situation – in detail, describe all of your options. If there are only two, and both of you really do not like, think third or fourth. Take still decision. br>
4. Anxiety in situations of uncertainty is a natural and quite common. It is often generated by catastrophic fantasies, interactome (prejudices, attitudes) or previous negative experiences.
most alarm's afraid of the specifics. Worried – gather information. Use only reliable, official sources and facts. br>
5. A factor contributing to anxiety, may be the experience of others. The blame for this so-called "mirror neurons". They give us the ability to recognize the feelings of others (be empathetic) and "learn from the mistakes of others", including the situation that happened with others in my experience.
If anxiety is your frequent companion, if you always paint a terrible picture of the tragedies, misfortunes, crimes, and catastrophes that can happen to you or your loved ones – stop to collect gossip, watch crime news and transfer, avoid always aching people and so on.
6. In chronic anxiety, panic attacks or increased personal anxiety I recommend to consult a psychologist or psychotherapist. br>
so, the healthiest VARIANT of responding to anxiety are actions aimed at minimizing risk. The world is not stable. You will never be able to control everything. There will always be factors that do not depend on you. No one knows the future. To completely prevent all possible situations of life threats can only supermen. Ordinary people can only minimize the consequences of the situation. For example, anxious parents every two minutes to ring the child released to her grandmother, a course which is only 10 minutes. Calm parents teach the child to call when he left and when he came, right to cross the road and not to talk to strangers.
Just think about it. And yet, cultivate a tolerance for ambiguity, the ability to collect useful information, to recognize their feelings and make choices.
©Natalia Emshanova
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