for anybody not a secret that the fate of the mistress unenviable. Its a lot of lonely holidays and weekend, greetings on SMS furtive and secret meetings away from prying eyes. She can't openly tell the world about his love. On the contrary, it is important that the world has never guessed, and thereby destroyed the fragile happiness. Her life gradually becomes an endless waiting for the right moment and a series of lonely nights. If the wife can remain in blissful ignorance, she knows that's not the only one.
So what makes a woman to make a choice in favor of married men? “worthy of All dismantled” - it is doubtful that a multimillion metropolis really there is not one decent and free. “After thirty to count what is not” - it's not the nineteenth century, when “in sorrow and in joy.." lasted all his life, even if grief there were much more than joy. Now the person is free at any time to get out of unfulfilling relationships and into the new. “the Wife did not understand him” - not one married man has a mistress, wife does not understand.
of Course, there are families who came to the edge of the abyss long before the mistress. Then such format of relations is quite understandable. But only the first six months. This is the period during which the male makes the choice in favor of one of the women. If not, then talk about the problems in the family, only the opportunity to achieve proximity to on the side.
According to statistics 10% of women prefer married men and three-fifths of them exclusively married. What is this woman? Of course, in the article we cannot explore all of their psychological characteristics. But conditionally they can be divided into two large groups:
- Women of the first group sincerely want to marry married man marry. They carefully develop and deepen the relations in all ways, seeking to translate the “on the side” in a legal marriage.
Women of the second group do not set themselves the purpose of creation of family. Some of them never confess in this setting and assure others that get married and have a baby really want, but men there are usually “securely married”. And heart, as you know will not order.
For both groups of ladies is characterized by a high assessment of men "married with children" and disregard free. If the former were solid and reliable, the second is frivolous and superficial. A similar trend occurs in quite young age. Potential “the eternal mistress” is usually brought up either a single mother or in full, but the formal family in which emotional closeness to father was absent. Deep down they don't believe in their own ability to understand man, to understand his character. Because for them it is important that the value of men was pre-determined by another woman, more competent in these matters.
Another distinctive feature of these women are located in the sphere of intimate life. Their sexual pleasure is overly differentiated. This quality means having vivid sexual release with a man and only a modest experience with others. In particular the sex with the beloved man a woman can deliver 100% satisfaction on a scale of sensuality, and with just a nice 50%. In the case of «lovers married”, the ratio is 100% with a married man and 0%, without any gradations, unmarried. There is a feeling that in one body live two women. One on fire and ready for any sexual exploits, and the other is cold and unfeeling.
for the rest, these two groups of women differ significantly. The first was ready for any sacrifice in order to get married lover forever. They are waiting for dates which fall, suffer “showdown with the wives” and more. Their perseverance to be envied and in some cases they get their way. Women of the second group are married usually do not go. The reason for this is often entomophobia – fear of close emotional contact. This psychological feature is formed in early childhood with emotionally cold, and sometimes brutal interactions with the parent of the opposite sex. These women are internal, unconscious anxiety of the thought of living together with a man. They, sometimes unknowingly, are in need of a breakup.
Another common reason for preference of married men is determined. This increased mental exhaustion. These women subjectively feel that permanent life with a man under the same roof, they “do not pull". They often have to explain to family members and colleagues on the topic of why they are not married. The real reason, of course, they can't, especially since they are often not even aware of. Then the output is – “to start a family, I would love, but fell in love married”.
Amateur married men often become clients of psychologists. To bear this burden is not easy. Secret passion generates a lot of heavy insults and psychological trauma.
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With sincere respect and care,
the Psychologist, Irina Nycnative
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