Why is this topic so important and relevant? First, as mentioned in the previous article, it passed in adolescence separation, people will not grow up and will live my life, looking back at the parents ' opinion.
second, rooted in our mentality, stereotypes, education is very conducive hyperopic and, on the contrary, complicate the separation.
Separation can be partly considered as a substitute for the ancient rite of initiation, after which the person is officially able to enter the adult world, “dropped old skin" of childhood, to acquire the appearance of an adult. For whatever cultural and historical reasons, the rite of passage we have lost. Then the advent of monotheistic beliefs and many other reasons, you can also say that this is a separate issue.
the Main thing is that the explicit boundaries of the attainment of adulthood faded and there was a period when the person is no longer a child but not yet adult. And the main task of this period – adolescence – the attainment of independence. But this task falls on the shoulders of both the child and parents that if we want harmonious development, must recognize the right of a teenager to their opinion and their mistakes, which he certainly will do, as we all do, but that's how he gets the experience and will gain in the future not only adulthood, but also maturity.
Every parent wants his child grew up a harmonious member of society and his mistakes, even if they are, were “fateful” character affecting the rest of his life – and drug use and crime. But in order for people (child, teen) they did not commit, should not be total control over his life. Needs to be completed tasks from previous periods – formed a secure attachment, a complete family and the involvement of both parents is sufficient emotional intimacy and love in the family, combined with support for autonomy, successful early socialization.
Only in this case, but not in the case of the situation of bans and controls, the teenager does not commit a fatal error and will harmoniously develop. The main task of adolescence – it is finding yourself as an independent (albeit only psychologically, not financially) person.
it is important to stress that adolescence, being the age “the collapse of authority” can be and should be challenging, accompanied by a frequent lack of understanding of parents and maturing baby. When I say that someone's teenage period was "asymptomatic" no disputes between parents and children, it is frequently an alarming sign. Sometimes this means that teenagers, for whatever reasons, did not have the strength to defend their position and point of view, or not receiving enough love of the mother, he or she wanted to earn it, in all agreeing with the mother.
Thank you for reading :)
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