There is only one effective way to resolve problems is to solve them. no matter How obvious it was this statement, however, for many people it just does not fit in the head. When a problem occurs, the first thing to do to most people is to shift it to someone else. And if this issue actually directly affects us, we will not be able to solve it because I don't want to take responsibility in the emergence of this problem.
People can solve the problem only if said to himself: "This is a problem for me and I need to solve it." But most people try to avoid challenges and do not want to endeavor, try to find the facts proving that the problem should be solved by other people, not themselves.
Talking about the solution to life's problems, I would like to draw your attention on two types of people in violation of the responsibility.
First – takes full responsibility for himself and for the guy, and even in that case, when it's really not his problem.
Frequent phrases of the type:
"I could...(to do better, to prevent, to change the situation, to predict...)"
"I had to...(to meet, to seek, to save...)
Such people feel small and constantly erring, and trying my best to make up for "the guilt"
Second type almost never takes responsibility, this person always blame the weather, the government, the economy, the neighbors, and he just by chance turns out to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.
people of this type often hear the phrase:
"I couldn't..." and a lot of reasons and excuses why he could not
"I had..." and then the explanation with indication of the sources of influence
Such people do not want to take responsibility, staying out of the way, consider themselves to be deprived of any right of choice and everything that happens to them is the influence of external forces which he cannot influence.
In the case of conflict the man of the first type takes it ALL on himself, and the man of the second type on the contrary accuses the whole world and screams about his innocence.
many people have both types of response to problems and accepting their own responsibility depending on the situation. In some circumstances, they blame themselves, others don't want to admit his obvious mistake.
In fact, this is one of the most important tasks of humanity is to learn to recognize that I should be responsible for and what not. And this task is likely to long remain unresolved, as too many nuances, challenges and introspection in each case.
Almost every man has the first and the second type of violation of liability, so people who willingly engage in self-development, will be useful to see a psychologist.
People of the first type will be easier to get rid of excess, foreign liability due to psychotherapy because they are aware of their problems.
as for the second type, they most likely won't even go to a psychologist because they have problems and should change only the world, despite the fact that it is easier to wear comfortable shoes, than to lay in soft grass the whole earth.
how are You doing with the responsibility?