“Well at least mom doesn't know" - thought Pauline.
Because if the mother knew, now it would be heavier. Would have to take responsibility not only for your feelings but for her.
Pauline why, then straightened the pleats on the bedspread.
He was sitting next to. And watched. As a very just watched.
- I love you so much, Paul said it aggressively. And there was a feeling that he appeals to something more in the Pauline than just her. She somehow understood what he meant.
And then she sees. Loves. Yes, he does.
Not because it gives flowers. And not because it comes early from work. But because he loves. But otherwise, why else would he be with her?
Pauline shrugged her shoulders.
In her mind clicked some mechanisms.
you Can cry and run away in hysterics. To turn the phone off. To go blindly down the street, preferably in the rain. Do not disassemble the road to hurt passers-by, and be killed by grief. Then to get sick. Not much, but good quality. Lying delirious with fever. Let the doctors come. Let tablets, broth and exhaustion. So what? It's too strong a shot, to experience it otherwise. Let him be ashamed. Let him feel guilty.
Or begin to shout, throw things, put them in a suitcase. To say that "Quit!”, and it will stop. To beat him, talk shit that he was disappointed that he went on all four sides, it is now very quickly you will find with whom to change. Let it be also painful, like she!
Or just proudly leave without saying goodbye. Tomorrow. He comes home from work, and there is not a trace of her presence. Empty. In the closet, on a shelf in the bathroom and even no note. She will not tolerate to afford such treatment. She's not in the trash found.
Pauline was still sitting on the bed.
the Girlfriend laughed at. "He cheated on you and you just forgive? Where's your pride? And that he even never gave anything? And as you now sleep with it you will be? But if he will change? Where are your guarantees?".
Pauline snorted. "Yes, it is better not to know. And so forever and will remain chief among them humiliated and violated."
She thought.
Her that don't want guarantees? Want. And that they are someone? Or maybe she doesn't want now hot declarations of love, assurances that this will never happen again? And "ask me anything!"? Want. Where this is true? Or maybe she doesn't want to hurt him in return? Want. Just, that'll have to sleep with someone? Fu.
Pauline shrugged again. She didn't know what to do.
- I don't know what to do, she said simply. - All the knowledge on this topic in my head is not encouraging. So I will sit here some more.
Paul smiled. He'd be a complete idiot if I could not understand that demons are now fighting in Polenino soul. But if he was a complete idiot, they would never be together. Or he would secretly went to see Lena again and again.
Paul understood very clearly that he refused to repeat the scenario of their parents. Refuses the stigma of "bastard" how often the grandmother called for the eyes of his father and mother silently lowered his eyes. He suddenly realized that this is his personal choice how he lived life. How to build a relationship with his wife and the atmosphere in which to raise children. No other authority but himself. And even despite the fact that he is still not fully understood what to do - the decision was made. And somewhere deep down, Paul knew that the decision is a very important step on the way to something bigger.
often, However, very easy to trace the point where it will lead us to certain actions. It is sufficient to deploy next logical chain of events.
in order to preserve the relationship in terms of infidelity will need to try. Trust to restore is not easy, especially if it is already on the brink of death thanks to the plants: “you can't trust Anyone”, “Every man for himself”, “Man is a wolf" and so on. Any team work requires honesty and purity of intentions. Very often the power over us the negative experience from the past, where we are not understood, not accepted, rejected, accused. Change is hard, a lot of hard to open and throw the past away. It is therefore important to take a fair decision: “You want to continue to be together or not”?
If the answer is Yes, then it is mandatory to enter the conflict with their own manipulations, to abandon selfish interests and begin to do so that was good each participant of the relationship. And it really can be done. Because if not, then why the hell need such a team?
© Alexey Afanasiev. Maria Afanasyeva. Svetlana Guadua. Alena Samitova.
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